MISSING
Chapter Not Yet Numbered (II)
...The greater issue, of course, is that because I know my few inner circle cards, I cannot love myself. There - I've created a game even I cannot beat; I am an incompetent loser at my own game, my own life.
Fatalism, self harm for preservation, destruction of others: I permit my sins because I know everyone else around me hides equal perversions (and they do, because I keep people around me who also house and hide perversion and vice).
I permit my vices to disseminate; I am vainly in love with the person I have almost actually become. I almost believe that I may become the person I am pretending to be, if I just let this wretched personality exist and infest for a small time more.
I permit my vices to disseminate because I have to be beautiful - because beauty is the only worthwhile end I can actually find a way to achieve.
I permit my vices to disseminate because I am disgusted by my worthless life; external beauty is the only redeeming quality I have.
I wretch to think of the waste that my footprints on this Earth create.
I may very well be the world's most horrible contributor to The Human Footprint (http://wcs.org/humanfootprint/index.html). My contributions are so unimaginably wretched and destructive I deserve a death of stone or fire.
I am not a witch, but I am a wretch and my society should put an end to me - because I am a harm to them, and a greater harm for their prolonged generations.
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